Big Debut

This year 12 teachers from my school left to go to other schools.  The school had a big farewell dinner at our provinces best galbi (beef and pork ribs) restaurant. During the dinner, all the teachers had little speeches likely saying about how much they will miss the school.  I say likely because I didn't have a sweet clue what they were saying.  We have a few dinner's throughout the year, and although it usually involves a nice free meal, they're pretty boring.

At the end of the dinner, my principal hands out a bunch of different envelopes and my co teacher gets one.  Out of curiosity, I ask what it's for.  Apparently the school has given out money given to us so we can all go out together after the dinner for the next phase of the night.  Phase was the word used, so I wasn't really certain what to expect. I was hoping it just involved having a few drinks, but only time would tell.  As everyone is getting their coats and things on they ask me if I'd like to go to a Norae Bang (personal Karaoke place).  I'd only had about one beer at this point, and whenever I've been to a Norae bang in the past, its usually at the end of a night of drinking.  I'm not liking the looks of it all, but decide to man up and go.

We get there, and I'm in a room with about 13 other women.  No men.  First thing, my principal comes into our room and sings a Korean song and he does pretty well.  Everyone claps.  My principal doesn't speak much to me at school, but with perfect English he asks what my favorite song is.  Trying to stall and not sing, I tell him that I have a few but I can't find any in the song dictionary (it contains songs and their codes) .  Without hesitating, he informs me that his favorite song is Love Me Tender.  He enters the number into the machine (all songs have a specific number) without looking at the book so I'm certain that he's sung this song a good hundred times before.  He starts it up and doesn't even look at the words on the screen, just belts it out.  He was good, really good. Once your finished, the machine gives you a rating from 0-100. Sure enough he got 100.  A Korean man singing an English song and he aces it.  I don't know how they rate a singer, but I've never gotten 100, and I think this may be the first time I've seen anyone get it.  Due to some Korean Norae Bang tradition, he takes out 10 000 Won (about $10) from his wallet, wets it and sticks it onto the TV. I'm under the assumption that if you match the score, you get the money. Thankfully he leaves the room and I continue to stall to put off singing.

My co teacher asks me who sings my favorite song and I tell her The Killers, but unfortunately they aren't in the book.  To my dismay, she flips to the bank of the book which just happens to contain newer songs that have been recently added.  I'm starting to get a little worried and as luck would have it, she found The Killers.  Mr. Brightside to be exact and entered it into the machine.  Within a matter of moments, I'm given the microphone and sent up to sing.  I'm a bad singer, not even OK on a good day so I wasn't too thrilled about this.  However, I give it my best. I quickly realize that all those times when I'd had a bit to drink and thought I was singing pretty good, I'm now pretty damn sure I wasn't. On top of all this, some of the women stand up and start dancing and shaking tambourines.  I'm almost feeling like a rock star here.  Singing it up, women dancing all around me, shaking their junk.  By junk, I mean their tambourines. The song finishes and I get a huge applause.  I think its out of pity but I guess it's better than getting booed.  My score........ 96.  Not quite enough to get the 10 000 won sitting on the TV, but its a nice score and I'm happy its over with.

That's not the end of my singing career at the school though.   A few other teachers belt out their favorite old time Korean songs, and despite the fact that I clearly never grew up in Korea and can hardly speak the language, they always feel the need to ask if I know the song that their singing. Clearly not.  Next, my vice principal comes into the room and says she wants to hear me sing.  I'm not angry, but I'm far from happy.  Not sure of what song to do next, I tell them to pick an old one for me and hopefully I'll know it.  Ohhh, the suspense builds as a couple teachers look at each other with smiles, then slowly turn towards me.  Dancing Queen.  Oh, how could they have known I was a die hard Abba fan?  I manage to persuade one of the other women to accompany me in singing.  Luckily, most of the teacher's know this song, so they all sing along.  As a result, it was hard to hear my horrible voice.  Score this time around is 97.  Somehow I'm getting better.  Not good enough to get paid for it yet though.  Two songs down, I must be done.

A few moments later, my principal rushes into the room and grabs me.  This comes as a bit of relief.  I'm thinking that maybe he wants to get out of this madness and grab a few beer.  WRONG.  Let's parade the white boy around to another room and have him sing for some more people.  It's not all bad though.  This time my principal wants to sing with me.  Must mean he like's me.  What in the world will we be singing together? Yesterday by the Beatles.  I don't really know the song all the well.  He did.  I think there's something wrong with that.  Things went fairly well though.  Sounded just like Paul and John back in the day, with a Korean accent mixed in.  My principal gives me a high five afterwards and leaves the room.  I turn to the TV to see our score.  100. Holy shit, I've done it.  I've never attained this level of perfection in the Korean Karaoke scene, but today was the day.  It started out well at 96, slight improvement to 97 and then with the aid of my principal I can now call myself a pro. 

My fingers and mind can already imagine spending the 10 bucks.  After all this insanity, I feel as though I have earned that money.  Unfortunately though, that's not how things works. If you get 100, even if there's already money on the screen, you don't get to take it.  You have to but more money up.  Who get's all this money in the end? Well, the company that runs this great establishment.  As a reult, it prolonged my singing career.  Once your time runs out they hand the money to the manager who adds some more time to your machine.

I was not quite finished yet though, there was still one more song left for me on this night. Within this new room and new group of teachers, they all come to the consensus that I should sing again.  Like they could read my mind and passion for music they chose my favorite song.  Dancing Queen.  My jaw nearly falls off my face.  I try to explain that I've already sang it once, but before I can get through to them, the music begins in the background and I'm off again doing my best to sound like a blond Swede.  Once the score is revealed at the end, its clear I did not give my best effort, but I'm happy.  91.  That means two things: 

1. I can keep the last bit of money in my wallet 

2. We are finally out of time and so are all of the other rooms.  No more Dancing Queen for this guy.